Many of us, when we start training, despite the great willingness to help others and do something interesting ourselves, fight some kind of internal (often unconscious) struggle with ourselves. On the one hand, we have ideas and tools to help others in their personal development, and on the other hand, we repeat aloud or mentally every day many words that take away our power to help others.
What are these words?
The most frequently repeated are: “I can’t, I don’t have enough skills yet, I still have to learn… (and here comes a long list of training / studies), I don’t know enough” etc.
Negative words repeated every day become our mantra, and therefore also our reality.
Instead of starting our business from a small project, we dream of a bigger one, the implementation of which depends on who we think we have to become to be able to start.
At the beginning, it is worth realizing the enormous power of words. What we repeat and hence the energy materializes in our reality.
Everyone who conducts courses, trainings, webinars also started at some point. We often have idols of ours from the industry in which we want to operate and we compare ourselves to them, forgetting that they also started out once. Back then they didn’t have all the skills they have now.
So what did they have or what could they have earned?
A sense of self-confidence and agency.
You can have it too. So how can this be achieved?
1. The first step may be to replace the words you say to yourself (about yourself) every day. In the case of “I can’t, I don’t know” – I recommend that you sit down with a pen and a piece of paper and write down your studies, trainings, courses, skills, what other people say about you and what they value you for. The next time it comes to your mind to say “I can’t, I can’t” you pull that card out and read it aloud to yourself.
2. It is worth putting aside comparing yourself to others and noticing the shortcomings, and focus on what you already have, what is already your resource. Also, notice how you feel when you say out loud, that you know something, can do something, you are proud of yourself, and how you felt when you repeated negative words to yourself.
3. Another important thing is to be aware of your power to transform yourself. If you have managed to change something in your life, you are living proof that such a transformation is possible. This fact alone will make you a great inspiration for many people. For most people, experience is more important than knowledge gained only from studies or books. If you have undergone an internal transformation yourself, then „I have the power”, so you can repeat these words to yourself, and even sing 😉
We can only be the best experts in what we have experienced ourselves.
Often, when something is known to us, we devoted a lot of time to it, it begins to seem “so trivial, so nothing”. And we start to diminish our knowledge. Because we’ve gone through a certain process, met people with a similar experience, read books and articles in a field where a lot of information (naturally!) repeated itself, we start to think that what we know, what we can do, is „nothing special”. Something that has become very familiar to us begins to seem familiar to everyone. It is not so! And it is worth realizing that.
Exactly your way, your experience is your huge resource, knowledge that no one else has and it is worth sharing it with others.
When you change your inner monologue from “I know too little, I can’t” to: “I have undergone a huge transformation, I have a lot of experience, I know so much and I can help so many people”, you will automatically go out to your future clients with a different energy, with the energy of a person, which attracts people to themself.
About the Author:
I am a dietitian and psychotraumatologist. I conduct trainings and workshops for women in the field of strengthening self-esteem and relations with the body and with food. In my work I use techniques such as Rapid Transformational Therapy, meditation and conscious breathing. I believe that we create our own reality. I show how to move from the victim mentality (in which we are often stuck because of the harm experienced in childhood) into the mentality of an adult, mature person who decides about his own life. More information about me and my workshops and individual processes can be found at www.magdalewandowska.pl
This article is the result of the „Wider Horizons” project, implemented by Development Support Foundation Innovator.
Project is co-financed by the European Union under Erasmus + Programme. (KA1 – Learning mobility of individuals, Mobility of adult education staff, Agreement No. 2020-1-PL01-KA104-079945).
This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication reflects the views only of the author, and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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